A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home
from work and his wife says, “Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the
pipes is leaking, could you fix it?” The husband says, “What do I look like, Mr.
Plumber?” A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says,
“Honey, the car won’t start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for
me?” He says: “What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?” Another few days go by, and it’s
raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, “Honey, there’s a leak
on the roof! Can you please fix it?” He says, “What do I look like, Bob Vila?” The next
day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car.
He asks his wife what happened. “Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them,” she
says. “Great! How much is that going to cost me?” he snarls. Wife says: “Nothing. He
said he’d do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him.” “Uh, well, what
kind of cake did you make?” asks the husband. “What do I look like,” she says, “Betty
Crocker?”
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